Tagged: M&S

Remember when I used to spend time writing complaints in the hope of getting a £10 voucher which would keep me fed for a few days? Well, I don’t do that nowadays. Partly because it isn’t worth the effort – I’m neither especially bothered about the hope of a voucher, nor does a total of 3 views really enthral me. Plus supermarkets are much tighter now – I do still complain when something is wrong, but it is more of a battle and, well, I can only be bothered if they’ve really pissed me off. However, there are a couple …

Well it’s that time of year for looking back – and 2022 has certainly been a fun year, even if I didn’t quite achieve as much as I like to demand of myself. As normal, most of these moments are positive, but a few are negative – this is “moments” as opposed to “highlights”, as I don’t want to forget the challenges and difficulties of the world. Not particularly in order, but definitely the best moments at the end. Let’s start with an achievement, shall we? 18. Promotion! Possibly a bit of a cheat including this as I knew in …

I’m looking for a new job. Firstly, isn’t the image cool? I’ve got access to Dall-E’s AI image generator, and this is what I received from “unhappy software engineers, pained by Gustav Klint, in a Marks And Spencer’s shop”. Yes, M&S has finally pissed me off sufficiently to hit the feared button on LinkedIn – the “open to new positions button”. Yes, an influx of recruiters has begun. What happened? Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I was merrily coding away on my Outfit Generator project – using the new tech stack, a project that was promised to me in …

I know I should have written this back in December when people do those whole “look back” kind of things but maybe it would have got lost with everyone else posting pictures of themselves 10 years between. I did write some notes, vaguely, and it was astonishing as to just how much fun and enjoyment I had in 2019. There is so much that I am missing out here – holidays to Madrid and Corfu/Albania, two days at the cricket in The Ashes, the wonderful RA Summer Exhibition which I love so much, my leaving do at Lovespace, adventures to …

A complaint from 2018 – I think my final unposted one! And last ever complaint to M&S. ****** Dear M&S I went to M&S for breakfast this morning, in Moorgate, for the first time in around a month. It reminded me that I was due to complain to you – it has been on my to-do list for a few weeks. The reason it reminded me, was that I had gone in for a bacon and sausage sandwich. Alas, there was no bacon. But a sausage sandwich was sufficient. My real problem is an earlier sausage drought. A few weeks …

I guess as part of the HR checks, M&S didn’t think to look through their customer complaints to see if potential employees had ever written to them. Phew. Here’s one that I can publish, now I’ve passed my probation. From 2018. Yeah I have a backlog of these things. ****** Dear M&S A few weeks ago, I had a birthday. Actually, it was a few months ago, but hey, the point still stands. I’ve already lost track of what I was going to say. Yeah I’m one of those complaint writers that always writes some long-winded nonsense that you really …

From boxes to bras. From storage to suits. From packaging to pies. Yes, you have guessed correctly – you are looking at the new software engineer at Marks & Spencer. Well, you are reading words and daydreaming about me eating an M&S steak and ale pie in a suit. I hope. Back in February, I concluded that I was pretty much ready for the next challenge in my career. There was nothing pushing me out of Lovespace – I’ve never had a job where I genuinely look forward to going to work 95% of the time, where I actually enjoy …

Dear M&S I remember when I was a child, hating every single minute of being dragged around Marks & Spencer in Hull.  All I wanted to do was go out and play football, and perhaps set fire to the odd rubbish bin if I could steal some matches. But no, almost every Saturday, my mother and father decided that they would torture me by spending elongated periods in this infernal hell.  The only positive experience I ever had in there was when I found a penny on the floor. As soon as I was old enough to buy my own …

Dear M&S I normally love your food, however yesterday I was having a fat day so thought I would treat myself to some southern fried chicken – namely your box of drumsticks and thighs. Now I love a chicken thigh but hate drumsticks – they are like comparing MDMA to Meow Meow. One classy and beautiful – the other rough as a badger’s bum but better than nothing. So I was hoping it would be roughly half and half but out of a box of 7 chicken pieces – 5 of them were drumsticks! 5 drumsticks! Just 2 thighs. Very …